Thank god I have a big warm......

bed.
These last few days have been hell for some people in the UK. those without heating , the money to run it, or even a home.
I have spent these last few days in bed and still find time to moan (I have nothing to do WAH!).
At Christmas lets say a little thank you for all those things we have that many others don't.
Thank you British government and British taxpaying public for keeping me safe and warm and fed this Christmas.
Thank you to my family for all the love and support.
Thank you to my friends for the same.
Merry X mas.

Been dishcharged!

Well, let me just say the last few months have been a, whats the word I should use here? Errr, wierd? or maybe nightmare, or maybe shattering.
I have just spent 4 months in St Annes Hospital on the mental ward. It was messed up. Seriously messed up.
I got about 3 hours sleep a night if that. The guys in my dorm snored like champions. George, god bless you, there is something wrong with your nose!
I remember thinking at one point during my stay, that there had been a collapse of society and civilisation. And that I was being punished. I was a show prisoner in a new regime, being punished for being self absorbed. I thought that it had all started with the G20 riots. That because I had not taken part the new Marxist regime had decided to make an example of people like me. Narcissists. people so caught up in their own little world that they didn't notice a revolution occurring around them.
I thought the Daily Mail newspaper contained articles written for me by the resistance.

As part of this I would only be let out if it looked like I was enjoying myself and wanted to stay!

You know, I still don't understand what happened there. At one point I was being spoken about on the radio. Every channel I tuned into was about me!

Anyway, I'm out now. Sane.

Except my days are empty. Whilst in there all I spoke about was wanting to leave. But now I see it was OK. If I had had a secure room to call my own and more sleep I think I could survive there. A secure room, the internet and sleep.

Well now I have those. I sleep all day. I am on haldol which I hate cos it makes me so sleepy. I feel like my life is slipping away from me when all I do is run around half asleep. Its been over a year now that I have been on medication that I feel I don't need. Hell, I dont know what I need. Last night I went to meet.com event and got scared by a load of sci fi nerds. I am a sci fi nerd myself but I still got self concious. Perhaps that is part of my personality now. Perhaps nothing can be done. Just let go

thousand and yum!

You know, I love and appreciate the 1001 more and more. However, apparently my attitude towards some of the women of the 1001 and SFTS gives the impression that "anyone will do". Well, err, the ones I fancy WILL "do".

Anyway, went to a gig last night. Seriously thought I was going to see an old friend there and totally fell apart (smoked, drank, got arrested).

I feel like my head is being torn apart, and since not 48 hours ago I got a size 10 to the face it just might be.

"Would you like some Whine with that sir?" Seriously????

OH, and looked at GMs profile. Blurgh indeed.

1001 re-revisited

I remember the first time I went to the 1001. Caught the eye of one of the barmaids. She did have bangs (which I do like), but she also has a pretty face and an attractive friendly style (which I like(d) a hell of a lot more)

Oh, and I don't go "woo hoo!" at the breaks, not because I dont feel it, because I do, but because I can be a bit pompous and find it hard to let go (hopefully not too much though).

The thousand and one revisited

The people at the 1001 have never been anything but good natured to me, so I'm sorry I was offhand and patronising about the 1001 in my previous post, and have behaved ungraciously in the club itself.

I've spent an awfully long time alone and it was barely more than a year ago that 5 minutes in my local pub was enough to make me shake.

I know it does not excuse my awful behaviour but
I
AM
TERRIFIED.

Hare Vishal

I went out on the town with a friend of mine on Sunday. We were going to go shopping but the shops were shut so my friend suggested we visit a local temple.

As we approached the temple I looked longingly at the people in Soho square. It was a lovely hot day and a few cans of beer in the square would have been great, but I am trying to cut down on alcohol so the temple it was.

We went in and went upstairs where a woman was waiting , guiding visitors. She said something to Gihan and he went to take his shoes off. So I approached the woman myself to hear what she was saying. She had a bit of an accent so when she answered my question of "Sorry, what did you say was happening in 5 minutes?" with "There will be dancing then the curtain will be drawn back to reveal the deities." I wasn't sure I had heard correctly. Did she say deities? God like beings right here in Soho? seriously? behind that curtain?

My curiosity piqued I took off my shoes and joined my friend. Sure enough, after the dancing the curtain was drawn back to reveal, as promised, the deities. OR as some might have it, the curtain was drawn back to reveal the DOLLS.

Big, expensive, pretty looking dolls, but dolls nonetheless.

Over the next 15 minutes a lot of fuss was made over the dolls/deities. They were fanned and had scented smoke blown over them and people bowed in front of them. At one point several people (including myself) were shunted to one side to create a parting of the small crowd that had formed. When I looked to see what this parting was for , I saw that it was so a hitherto unnoticed deity-doll at the back of the room could have a clear view of the two deity-dolls at the front.

Now, because I often feel the need to try and be a cynical smartass, this whole thing may seem ludicrous, but it wasn't. It was done with such clear eyed sincerity and joy that I really felt swept up by the whole thing. The heat (it was one of the hottest days of the year) and the music were hypnotic.

When Gihan asked if I wanted to go I had said no. I had wanted to see what happened next. And I'm glad I did. What followed was some incredibly beautiful chanting. They repeated the hare Krishna chant in so many ways it was amazing. Really uplifting and relaxing.
Cheers guys.

Are you all that?

probably.

Someone who IS "all that", according to my freind Rings, is Heidi Klum.

I agree, Heidi is hot, but her sister Trinny is hotter!.